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SOS BOOK Chapter 54: What’s stopping you?



WE KNOW WHAT TO DO, BUT STILL DON’T DO IT!

Many people know they should change the way they live, but they don’t do it! They know this would improve their wellbeing, but still, they don’t do it. So, what is stopping them? Why don't we just start our personal development & transformation?

…What is holding you back from starting positive changes?


WE SELF-SABOTAGE OUR PERSONAL GROWTH.

We avoid starting our transformation because of different blockers. A mild form might be called procrastination. A more deeply entrenched form would be termed ‘self-sabotage’. Later in this SOS book we will discuss self-sabotage and how to overcome it. But let's first consider our general reluctance to change.


…What areas of your life are you reluctant to change?


WEALTH DOES NOT GUARANTEE HAPPINESS.

We all know of people who seem to have wealth, talent & plentiful opportunities. Yet these people still seem to have a poor quality of life. They may be ‘materially successful’ but they are not living their true potential or their joy. They just don’t make the best use of their talents and unique abilities. They may have material assets, but they aren’t using their inner assets. So, it's not a lack of material resources that's the real issue.


DISADVANTAGES IN LIFE CAN INSPIRE SUCCESS.

By contrast, some people with great disadvantages have become remarkable people. These disadvantages might include suboptimal parenting, harsh life situations or poor education.


Despite these setbacks, they still achieved remarkable outcomes! They enjoy a high quality of life. In fact, they are successful because they needed to overcome their disadvantages. Their challenges gave them the strength they needed to thrive. Their inspirational example should help motivate us all.


WE ARE ALWAYS WORTHY OF SUCCESS.

Remember that success and happiness is possible despite our external circumstances, be they favorable or not. But too often we think that our disadvantages can’t be overcome. We also feel we are not capable or worthy of that success.

…Are you using your disadvantages as an excuse?


COURAGE & RESILIENCE IS REQUIRED.

What then truly determines our success? How can we utilize & optimize our hidden potential? We know it’s not just our intellect, life situation or even our natural talents that’s crucial to our life quest.


What’s important is to have the courage & conviction to start our transformation. We won't always succeed at our first attempt. It can take many tries to finally break through to the next level. But our determination and resilience will allow us to keep improving!


TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR THOUGHTS & DECISIONS.

Every human being can improve their quality of life, simply by taking control of their mind. We simply start by becoming more aware of our thoughts. We can distinguish which ones are positive or uplifting. We then personally select some positive thoughts and choose to empower them.


We strengthen a positive line of thought simply by giving it more of our attention. This triggers a new selection of thoughts. We again choose the most positive ones by again giving them our attention. Each positive thought encourages even more positive lines of thinking. The process is as simple as that! That's the simple secret to our personal transformation and wellbeing.

…Can you see the power of focusing on positive lines of thoughts?


MISTAKES ARE OPPORTUNITIES TO PRACTISE.

We must take responsibility for our thoughts and their consequences. We accept full responsibility for the outcome! The aim is to choose positive thoughts that lead to positive outcomes. But it is a natural part of being human to a mistake, or even many mistakes. The mistake gives us another chance to select a better line of thought, and eventually to get it right!


The process of selecting our thoughts is really so simple. But that does not mean that it's always easy to do. It does not mean that we will make the right choice every time. It’s how much we learn from our mistakes that really counts.


WE CAN FILTER OUT UNHELPFUL THOUGHTS.

New thoughts will continually surface to our conscious awareness. The prompting of new thoughts is automatic, and this does not stop. We do however have inner resources to help us filter these thoughts. If we correctly instruct it, our brain’s supercomputer will respond to our commands. We just need to practice giving our brain the right instructions. We simply oversee the process. Our intuitive guidance is also available to both prompt and guide us.

…Will you take charge by giving your brain the right instructions?


MANY LEAVE THEIR MIND ON AUTOPILOT.

However, we must consciously choose to take control of our mind. This is our choice as a sovereign being. However, not many people choose to take command of their mind. Most opt-out of conscious decision making. This results in the system running on automatic pilot and being directed subconsciously by our ego.


People usually relinquish their responsibility out of simple ignorance. They don't understand why it’s so important to maintain oversight. Regardless, we are responsible for our choices. Even if our choice is not to choose consciously. And we still bear responsibility for that outcome!

…Are you giving up control of your mind to an autopilot mode?


THERE IS AN URGENCY TO START OUR QUEST.

It can take some time & practise to take back control of our mind! We have limited vitality and lifespan. There is therefore some urgency to commence this change! The sooner we start, the better. There is deep regret in not even starting!


There is an exciting life quest ahead. This path leads to ever increasing awareness, capacities & abilities. But the decision to walk this path is solely ours to take! We will have a lingering sorrow if we never commit to this journey. Don’t waste this lifetime and its opportunities. We can take back control and start creating positive change. Then a whole world of opportunity opens up to us.

…How much longer will you delay or procrastinate?


WE ARE FEARFUL OF CHANGE & FAILING.

We have discussed procrastination as a hurdle for change. The next most common reason is that we are fearful and scared of failing! Too often, we can’t overcome the perceived risk. Or we don't feel capable enough. So, we opt-out of trying something new! Particularly if this involves making major changes to our whole life! When we perceive the risk or difficulty is high, we struggle to commit to the change.


If fear of failure is a big issue for us, we could try viewing the situation differently. We could reframe it with a new perspective! Remember, just by attempting the change, you have already made progress. It doesn’t matter if you were successful or not on this occasion. You are bravely doing the work, and this is a success in itself. On the other hand, the worst failure of all is giving up before you even start.


FAILURE IS FACING DEATH FEELING UNFULFILLED!

So, will we accept this opportunity to change ourselves? This path also leads to lasting happiness, fulfillment & inner peace. But this does not mean that the path will always be easy! In fact, significant personal growth will always be a challenge! But this difficulty is what makes the journey so valuable and more worthwhile. We grow more quickly in the face of adversity.


…Are you open to experiencing challenges on your journey ahead?


WHY ELSE DO WE RESIST POSITIVE CHANGE?

There are a wide range of other reasons why we hold ourselves back. Why else do we resist change?


● We worry about being marginalized or ‘losing face’.

● We want to avoid shame, blame and guilt.

● We don't feel worthy enough.

● We might feel it’s all hopeless.


ARE YOU SUBCONSCIOUSLY RESISTING CHANGE?

Sometimes we start but we might not follow through. That means our subconscious self-saboteurs are probably then at work. These resistance mechanisms have been installed from early childhood. But we can become more aware of these saboteurs. And then we can overcome them! Having courage and momentum will help overcome this resistance.

…Are you ready to discover and let go of your saboteurs?


Just making this commitment is the important first step. In the next chapter we will explore where to go from there.


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