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SOS BOOK Chapter 8: Let’s start afresh.


Deep within us, we have a yearning. It’s a powerful drive and an inner need! We have a heart-felt desire to live a different way: to live a more compassionate & loving way. We simply CHOOSE to be more kind & loving. First, we simply practice loving ourselves! That’s how we can start.

We can reset our lives and start afresh! We can choose a new way that's more loving. But we must want this enough! There is a TIPPING POINT of really wanting to change! We must want this change with our whole being.

We must want this even if this feels like we are taking a risk. We must commit to change even if it means risking everything. We can overcome our doubts and our fear of the unknown. But to do this, we must be... SICK OF SUFFERING!


Something is lacking in our lives! We have ignored our true nature, and our deep needs & desires. So, beneath our brave facade, we can feel lost and alone. But instead of facing this underlying issue, we tend to blame others and even ourselves!

We have concluded that we are unworthy, and that we don't deserve to be loved, just as we are! We have even manufactured a whole new personality, an Ego, and we live that false role. We accommodate and try to please others. But too often we forget our true self!

What we most yearn for, is a deep loving connection… to our true self! This connection is primarily an inward one. It’s a connection to our true inner nature. To help achieve this inner reunion, we simply need to forgive & accept ourselves! We accept ourselves as we are now. Without making this loving connection, we will never feel whole. This inner union is how we make peace with ourselves. In essence, this is how we heal our past and all our suffering!

To reset our life, we first need compassion & love for ourselves! This process starts by raising our awareness and having a loving intent. It does not require any significant physical effort or other resources. It only requires that we watch our mind and guide our thinking. But this does require considerable attention and our loving intent! This SOS book will explain how to do this in detail.

We can take back control of our conscious decision making. We can claim rightful sovereignty over our decision making, and our life! We do this by becoming aware of our thinking and decision making. But are we prepared to do this? Usually, we just resist and try other ways. So, we continue to suffer! Are you ready to explore this new path and try a new way?

...Let’s investigate this together.


There has been a gradual build-up of trauma & suffering in our lives. All this seems to happen spontaneously! Eventually we realize that we are just not content with our life. We feel dissatisfied with our life and ourselves. We don't really feel happy, fulfilled or at peace.

Our distress becomes a powerful invitation to change ourselves. It motivates us to reset our life and start afresh. But will we heed our frustration, and this invitation to change? Usually, we don’t!


It can take a life crisis before we fully realize the need to transform ourselves! Rarely do we awaken earlier and re-evaluate ourselves. That is because, at first, our life problems might seem minor. But these problems can quickly build, and we become overwhelmed! That is what we call a life crisis!

A life crisis can be triggered by simple everyday situations. This can involve our work, finances, health, family or relationships. This situation is an important SOS signal or warning. It's also a call to action! Unless we change ourselves, we risk total overload and breakdown.


Mostly we just patch up our problems in life when they arise. We do the best we can at the time! But these are usually band-aid solutions. What we really need is a real change of heart and sufficient intent to carry this through! Will we continue to live the old way? Is that really how we are meant to live? Has it really worked out?

…What might the new alternative be?


This SOS book gives the reader a real alternative! It’s also a means of utilizing a crisis, or any unsatisfactory life situation. We can even decide to change our life right now. This book provides simple instructions on how to pause, reset our life and start afresh.

But first we must confirm we are sick of suffering! This is an important personal declaration to make. Do we have enough compassion & love for ourselves? Will we forgive & accept ourselves as we are right now? That acceptance can happen in an instant! But sometimes it takes a whole lifetime for us to get round to this!

Only we can decide when it is time to transform ourselves. This can occur after a big crisis, or a small one. But how do we do this? This book provides simple guidance on how to reset our life and start afresh!


Unfortunately, we lack awareness of our true situation. We just don't know what we don't know! We don't understand what the underlying core issue really is. We don't understand the cause of our suffering! We can't see the root of the problem yet! That’s where this book can help.

We tend to downplay our suffering, and just find a way to compensate. We don't understand that a much deeper underlying problem exists. We also lack awareness of our true nature! We don't really understand how our mind and inner being works.

Sometimes we just lack the instructions required. We don't know what to do. We don't know how to change ourselves. This book or others can provide the information required. But usually that’s not the main issue. Can you guess what the real problem is?


We are usually doubtful, confused and reluctant to start anything new! Sometimes we are just too cynical or skeptical to even try. It’s just too confronting to change ourselves. But there are even more issues to confront.

Our old habits, beliefs & expectations make us resistant to change. These can be quite entrenched through years of social conditioning and reinforcement. Some of our behavior may be an adaptation to past trauma or family dynamics.

To make matters worse, we unknowingly sabotage ourselves. Our own ego will try to resist or block our attempts to change. The ego uses subconscious mental strategies to limit us because it feels threatened. The ego thinks that it alone should run our life!

But all this can be overcome, and there is a way! It's a simple way, but it does require some understanding! So, let's get started…


There is a strategy for lasting happiness & joy! It’s very simple, but that doesn’t mean it's always easy to do! This will need some further explanation. That’s why we have written this book. Some people will demand or need a lot of explanation! So that help is available for them too. Others will want just the outline or the essence. So, both options are available.

What is the overall strategy? We could summarize this strategy in one sentence: We commit to achieving the ‘best state of mind’ that we possibly can. That's the essence of what we do. This, as you might imagine, will primarily be an inner process. It might sound simple in theory, but how do we achieve this in practice? That is what this book will explain, both in essence and in detail.

Do you want the essence first? To achieve this ideal state of mind, we simply choose a ‘path of inner peace’. We simply aim to maintain an inner state of peace and ‘loving kindness’ at all times. But we all know that it’s not always easy being loving and non-judgmental. There are many techniques and approaches that can help, and we discuss these later.

In essence, to achieve our goal, we need to ‘watch our mind’. So, as the saying goes, it is ‘an inside job’. We do this transformation by ourselves and within ourselves. Our personal transformation is primarily an internal one. It occurs within our mind! We do this simply by keeping a close eye on our mind. We observe our feelings, our thinking and our vibe.

…Can you see how the transformation required is an internal one?


We can even permanently Stop Our Suffering! This strategy is explained in this SOS book. We can resolve our dissatisfaction and the empty feeling that exists within us! But remember, first we must be sufficiently ‘Sick Of Suffering’! This is the tipping point to start this whole journey! Otherwise, we probably won't follow through.

What then is the essence of ‘Stopping Our Suffering’? We do this by reconnecting to our true inner nature and becoming whole again. We overcome ‘the separation’ from who we really are. We have unknowingly separated from or rejected an important part of ourselves. We have denied our true inner nature! Understanding that concept is a big leap in itself. This may require considerable explanation, so we will provide this shortly.

Re-establishing that loving inner connection is what we really yearn for! But how do we start this in practice? We might already be in considerable distress, or even in a crisis! So, let's consider our own personal situation right now. What do we do?


Others might offer us advice & support, but the best guidance will usually come from within. That’s the secret! We need to look deeply within and be open to any insights! We must invite & welcome this guidance! Our intuitive insights and heart-felt inner knowing will indicate the best path. We need to listen to this and heed the gentle nudges! This can take some relearning and considerable practice.

We can reset our life and start afresh! To do this, it helps to have a ‘higher perspective’ or ‘over-view’ of our situation! A higher perspective is like having a road map! This can help us work out where we want to go, and which direction to take. But the very best guidance on which particular route is best for us, will come from deep within.

Will we change our lives now, or wait for an even bigger issue? Do we need a major breakdown in our life, or our health? That is part of the BIG question! It all comes down to how compassionate & loving we want to be to ourselves.

...Are you sufficiently sick of suffering?

That is the BIG QUESTION we will now consider....


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