Archive for the 'Parenting' Category

Published by ScarlettCapelli on 08 May 2008

Preparing Your Child For Kindergarten

As your child approaches school age, you may be wondering if he has the necessary skills to pass his kindergarten screening. There are several things that you can do to prepare your child to enter the school environment.

To interest your child in reading, you should read aloud to them often. This activity will help your child to understand that the printed words represent the spoken words. By asking the child questions about the story, you can help to build up his comprehension skills. You can also teach him words that rhyme and show him how many of these word’s spellings are similar. As you are reading to him, you should point out unknown words and explain their meanings to build up his vocabulary.

You can take your child to the library to read. Many of these institutions have programs especially designed for preschoolers. They often have story times, puppet shows, and other activities geared to encourage a love for reading in these youngsters. These excursions are also the perfect opportunity for your child to become familiar with the layout of the building itself so that as he gets older, he will feel comfortable going there to check out books and do research for school on his own.

You should also print your child’s name often so that he can begin learning how it looks in print and how to spell it. You can also use the letters in your child’s name to help him to associate certain letters with certain sounds. You can take the individual letters of your child’s names and help him finds words that have the same letters in them. This is also a good time for your child to start to practice writing his name.

To help your child prepare for kindergarten math, you should make sure that he is familiar with shapes and colors. He should also have the ability to at least count to ten (preferably twenty). You can practice his shapes with him by drawing or finding objects for each shape and have your child identify them. You can help your child with his counting skills by using various items, placing them in a group, and have him count the total number. You can also practice his problem-solving skills by adding and taking shapes away from the group and having him recount the new total. This will establish a foundation for addition and subtraction. You can play board games with him that requires your child to roll a pair of dice and move a certain amount of spaces. This is good counting practice and a chance to spend some quality time with him as well.

Many children need to develop their fine motor skills when preparing to enter school. You can build these skills by having your child practice cutting straight and wavy lines with child scissors. You can also encourage him to draw pictures with little details in them. Stringing beads on a piece of thread is another way to build up your child’s coordination.

If you practice all the skills that he will need to start kindergarten, your child should pass his kindergarten tests with flying colors.

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Published by ScarlettCapelli on 08 May 2008

Learning To Deal With Stepchildren-The Beginning

With the soaring divorce rates today, combined families are becoming more common. Recent statistics have shown that 50% of all marriages will end in divorce, leading to one out of every two children living in a single-parent home by the age of eighteen. 80% of these divorced people will remarry which means that at one point in their lives, the majority of all children will have a stepparent. Becoming a stepparent can be a an awkward and difficult situation, but there are several things that you can do to help you and your stepchild.

It is normal for most stepchildren to resent a new stepparent. Sometimes this resentment is due to the underlying hostility that their biological parent feels towards the former spouse’s new relationship. The children may also view you as an obstacle that stands in the way of their dream (however unrealistic) that one day their parents will get back together. If their biological parent is not involved or is totally absent, they may also see you as an interloper who is trying to take that parent’s place.

As a stepparent, you need to understand these feelings and have the patience to give the children time to become accustomed to you at their own pace. Forcing the issue can cause even more resentment and can push the children even farther out of your reach. If the problem stems from hostility on the former spouse’s part, your spouse needs to discuss the issue with the other party and the two of them need to reach some kind of agreement for the benefit of the children. It would probably not a good idea for you to speak to the ex as that person may view you as an interloper also. If an amicable agreement cannot be reached, you will just have to accept it and take comfort in the fact that most children will make their own decisions about you in the end.

If the resentment stems from the children’s unrealistic expectations of a reconciliation between their parents, your spouse needs to sit down and have an open conversation with the children, explaining that reconciliation is impossible and that you are here to stay. Again, it would be helpful if your spouse’s former partner could be a part of the discussion if possible. If the children hear this naked truth from both parents, they will be more likely to believe it.

In the case of an absent parent, you can reassure the children that you do not wish to take that parent’s place and encourage them to talk about their mother or father. If the children wish to try to contact that parent, you should inform your spouse and offer whatever support is needed if he agrees to try to establish contact. After a period of time in your care, the children will begin to appreciate you as an important part of their lives and may even hold you in more esteem than their absent parent.

Starting a life together with a new spouse is difficult under normal circumstances, while adding stepchildren to the mix can make it all seem like it is not worth it. You need to remember that you married for better or worse, and with a little love and a lot of patience, you may be surprised to discover that you have been gifted with several children that love and depend on you and can fulfill your life more than you could possibly have known.

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Published by ScarlettCapelli on 08 May 2008

Establishing Time Management For Your ADD/ADHD Child

One of the symptoms exhibited by children who suffer from ADD/ADHD is being disorganized and having difficulty moving from one task to the next. By helping your child establish a good time management program, you can help assure that he will do better in school and in later life.

Many children who suffer from ADD/ADHD seem to function better if they follow a daily routine. You need to establish a time for specific activities such as mealtimes, homework, and bedtime and keep the same schedule every day. When scheduling a specific time for your child to go to bed, you should be aware that lack of sleep can make attention disorders worse. You should make sure that your child goes to bed early enough to enable him to get the recommended amount of sleep for children in his age group.

You may also want to try to schedule activities in the course of the day that will keep your child busy. Try to plan things that interest him as ADD children seem to focus better on activities that they want to do while their minds tend to wander when doing things that they are not interested in. You may want to plan projects that require your child to use his hands. Experts have noticed that children who suffer from ADD/ADHD seem to relax if they holding something that they can stroke with their hands, such as a stuffed animal or a lap pillow. When planning these activities you should not overwhelm your child with too many things to do in one day. Scheduling too many activities for an ADD/ADHD child can agitate the symptoms of this disorder.

Another way that you can help your child manage his ADD symptoms is to make sure that he has a place to go that is quiet and private. Because of his disorder, your child is bombarded by outside stimuli all day long. Ensuring that he has a place that is quiet with a minimum of noise and distractions can help your child to relax and can also help him to train his body to sit still for extended periods of time.

There are several ways that you can help your child to organize and manage his time. The first step that you need to take is to organize your home so that your child will know where different things should be. You should also make sure that your child has a specific place to do his homework that is away from any distractions. Depending on the amount of homework that your child may have, you will probably want to have him take several short breaks during his homework time. You may also want to purchase him a special notebook for recording his homework assignments so he does not forget any of them.

Many ADD/ADHD children become stressed if they are rushed. One way to avoid this is to have your child lay out his clothes for school the night before. You should also make sure that his schoolwork is located in a place where he can easily grab it on his way out. You can also avoid upsetting your child by making sure that he is awake early enough in the morning so that he does not feel as if there is a big rush to get out the door.

All children need some routines and structure in their lives, but this is especially true for children that suffer from ADD/ADHD. These youngsters feel insecure and anxious if they do not know what they are supposed to do next. By giving your ADD child a scheduled routine, he will feel less anxious and stressed and this will eventually build his self esteem. After he learns this routine, you may be surprised to see some of his symptoms lessen slightly. A little effort on your part now can enable you to help your ADD/ADHD child grow into a confident and healthy adult.

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Published by ScarlettCapelli on 08 May 2008

Tips In Dealing With An ADD/ADHD Child

As a parent of a child that suffers from ADD/ADHD, you may feel overwhelmed and even resentful towards your child as the daily stress of dealing with this disorder may seem to be taking over your entire life. There are several ways that you can reduce the stress and begin to enjoy time spent with your ADD child.

When you begin to get tired or even angry with your child after having to tell him ten times to do one task, you should remember that your child is probably more frustrated than you are. He wants to do what you ask but he does not know how to accomplish it. Supporting your child and focusing on the positive can help you and your child cope with his disorder with greater ease. You should recognize and encourage your child’s positive traits and behavior. You can also try to take some of the negative symptoms of ADD/ADHD and refocus them in a positive direction. If your child has difficulty focusing on one idea, ask him to express or write down all the things that he is thinking about. This can help to build his creativity and may also help him learn start to focus on one idea at a time. When asking him to do chores, you should make sure to give him one chore at a time instead giving him a whole list. Be sure to congratulate him on a job well done when he has successfully completed his chore. You should also not be too critical about how well the job was done. It is enough that your ADD child finished the task.

You can also take steps to improve your child’s communication skills. As many ADD children have difficulty maintaining direct eye contact, you want to make sure that your child is looking at you to ensure that he is paying attention to you. With a younger child, you may have to gently hold his face towards you and ask him to look at you several times in the course of the conversation. When giving your child instructions, you should give him one instruction at a time. You should repeatedly ask him to explain to you what it is that you are asking him to do. This will enable you to know if he was listening and whether or not he totally understood what you said. By having your ADD child express your instructions in his own words, you can also help him to build his comprehension as well as his conversational skills.

The most important thing that you should remember when dealing with your ADD/ADHD child is to maintain your sense of humor. By laughing off embarrassing indiscretions that your ADD child may make can help to make him more secure in public situations. It can also relieve any stress that he may be feeling as a result of this behavior once he sees that you are not upset about it.

These are just a few of the many ways that you can help alleviate the stress of dealing with ADD/ADHD for both you and your child. Once you have both began to take a more relaxed perspective in dealing with the disorder, you may be surprised to discover that you can have some control over ADD instead of it having control over you.

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Published by ScarlettCapelli on 08 May 2008

Understanding Childhood Stress

As adults, many of us deal with stress on a daily basis. Due to our maturity, we also have behavior and other patterns that are in place to help us deal with the changing level of stress in our lives. Children also are affected by stress without having the advantage of having these established patterns. As a parent, you can teach your child how to deal with stress effectively and eliminate the possibility of long-term damage to the child’s emotional state.

Childhood stress is divided into three categories. The first category is defined as normative or developmental stress which is classified as being low risk. This stress is caused by normal everyday situations and is part of the experience of growing up. Some examples of sources of this kind of stress in infants and toddlers include unfamiliar faces and surroundings, loud noises, and separation from their parents. As you see, these sources of stress are unavoidable and most children will become accustomed to them after a period of time.

For school age children, some sources of low risk stress could involve things like the arrival of a new sibling or starting school. As a parent, you can help your child deal with the stress in these situations by talking to them and being supportive. Encourage them to express their worries and concerns. If the child knows that he can talk to you, much of this stress will disappear.

The second category of childhood stress is critical or moderate risk stress. Examples of sources of this kind of stress in toddlers include overhearing their parents fighting, a lack of stimulation, and overstimulation. In school age children, this type of stress could be caused by moving to a new home. This level of childhood stress is a little more serious and you may need to call in outside help to aid your child in dealing with it. Your family doctor can give you suggestions about how to deal with stimulation issues. As for making a big move, you should talk openly with your child about his fears and concerns. Point out the advantages of your new home and try to emphasize how much fun it will be to make new friends.

The third category of childhood stress is catastrophic or high risk stress. This stress is the most serious and can leave permanent emotional scars on a child. Examples of sources of this type of stress include the death of a close one, the destruction of the child’s home by a disaster, a divorce, and child abuse. You should seek professional help for your child in these situations, as you are probably dealing with the stress also. In the case of a death or a divorce, you should fully explain to your child the situation and the outcome. Your child will realize that something is wrong and the truth will be far less dramatic than the possible conclusions that he may draw on his own.

When dealing with your child’s stress, you should try to remember what it was like at their age. Keep the lines of communication open and positively address any fears that he may have. By helping him deal with stress as a child you can help him to begin to put in place those protective behaviors that he will need as an adult.

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